December 3, 1998
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Gaultier on the death of his life-long lover His grandmother gave him the confidence to come out and knew he was gay before he knew himself Since his lover and partner, Francis Menuge, died of Aids in 1990, he has done nothing but work. He lives alone, seldom socialises, and divides his week between his factories in Italy and his headquarters in Paris, with occasional weekend excursions to London, where he stays at Blake’s hotel and browses round Portobello Road, keeping an eye on emerging street fashions. (He always says that the Brits dress better than the French – his favourite designer, un-expectedly, was the late Jean Muir.) When he talks about the death of Menuge, his eyes fill with tears and his normal arm-waving ebullience deserts him. He and Menuge built the business together – they met in 1974 when Menuge was a law student and Gaultier was still working for Pierre Cardin. It was Menuge who encouraged him to set up on his own in 1976 and "gave me all the security psychologically to be more sure of myself". The business was a disaster for the first three years, but then suddenly took off like a rocket in the 1980s, and Menuge handled all the financial side. Luckily, Gaultier now has another old friend, Donald Potard, to act as his business manager, but it is not the same – Potard is not his lover. He thinks it is unlikely that he will find another partner like Menuge – "It cannot be the same thing that it was because we were 20, 22 years old and we start something together – now it is already built. And also I must say I already have a big lover, which is my work." Menuge was ill for a year before he died, and Gaultier feels scarred by his memories of that terrible year. "It is something that marks you, you cannot after that live as before. When you see someone you love and who is very brilliant going down and down, declining, and going into death, after that you are different." Gaultier was even tempted for a while to give up fashion entirely. "After he died, I was thinking I always dreamed to make my dreams, which meant to be a fashion designer. Bon! So I did it, with him, and we did it very well and very successful – we were not rich, but we were doing what we wanted. So, I thought, without him, what is it? I was thinking maybe I stop, maybe I quit because truly, what can I do? To suicide, or to go on, and I was thinking maybe if he can see me he should send me a message saying ‘No don’t suicide, go on’ and I feel truly that he was saying that. Anyway, I am only good to do fashion – what can I do else? So I went on." Talking about Menuge, he drops his Eurotrash persona and reveals his real self – intelligent, thoughtful, deeply emotional, probably very lonely. But also very grounded: for all his constant talk about his "shyness", you sense a deep confidence in himself and in his talent. He ascribes this to his grandmother, who was more of an influence in his childhood than his parents. She was a faith healer, palmist and tarot reader, and he would sit under her table listening while she counselled housewives about their personal problems. He believes she gave him his self-belief. "Because I was loved very much by her and she was always telling me with the cards, 1,2,3,4, I see you will have luck, and 1,2,3,4, whatever you do you will be successful – all my signs were good. At school, it was not the same story but at least I had someone who had confidence in me." His grandmother seems to have guessed he was gay before he knew himself and gave him a book to read about two men who loved each other. He thinks he was "already a little effeminated" at school – he never wanted to play sports or talk about them, always preferring the company of girls. The big breakthrough at school was when a teacher caught him drawing Folies Bergères showgirls and made him walk round the school with the drawing pinned to his back. This was meant to be a punishment but in fact it was an encouragement – "When I went to the other classrooms, the guys all laughed and at the same time they appreciate, so after that they didn’t look at me in a despising way. So I knew from then I could be accepted and liked, so it gave me more confidence to go on." When he was 13 or 14, he read a book about Christian Dior which said that he was gay, and he thought, "Ah, if I want to make that job, maybe I have to be gay, too." Maybe he did – there are remarkably few non- gay couturiers. Why does he think that is? "Maybe the fact that one is surrounded by women who one is truly admiring, and being shy... How can I explain? I could and I have been in love with women you know, maybe two times. One time truly but it has been like more platonic, not completely 100 per cent platonic but at least 50 per cent platonic, let’s say. I was more attracted physically by men. But I was more comfortable with women, which I understand more, because of the sensibility, the cleverness, because women I think are educated to please, to seduce, very young." But why this desire to dress women? "But I desire also to dress men, you know! To be honest, I think there are some fashion designers that are misogynistic, but for me, the treatment I did for women, I did the same for men. With women, I never tried to make them so romantic, so flowery, don’t touch the reality; I never tried to make them like the cliché of the bimbo, or the dominatrix or whatever. And the women of today are not like they used to be, like slaves to the men. I never had that kind of misogynistic vision, and nor that thing of putting women on a pedestal that you cannot touch, or like a diva, or a caricature of that. Never. I only want to show women that were friends that I was admiring. Same for men – men also have to be seductive – and with men it is more difficult because it’s not in their education. People have to choose what they want to be. I don’t say be masculine – no, be feminine, no. Only, this exists, and it is beautiful and it can be beautiful if it is yourself – people should be accepted as they are." © The Guardian | The Observer * How he made it in fashion * The Offical Gaultier Website * Gaultier personal site an Electronic Mail & Guardian publication home  |   news  |   jumpstart  |   archives  |   madam & eve za@play  |   movies  |   theatre  |   fine art  |   books © q online - December 3, 1998

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